part two: during (the ceremony)

about a year ago, once the official wedding planning began, the first thing i took note of and ripped out of Martha Stewart Weddings was the advice of one of the editors: "make your wedding your own." she emphasized the importance of personalizing the big day, making it feel like "you."

having been to dozens of weddings in the last few years, i really, really, really wanted to make ours unique. while a big part of me is very traditional, i have always hated doing things the way everyone else does them and i applied that personal philosophy whole-heartedly to the wedding.

for example:

• i used the creative services of friends to add an extra-special touch to the invites, programs and place cards
• we opted to get married in the same place we were having the reception, so that we could make up the ceremony ourselves
• we got a self-uniting license (available in PA and only a few other states) so that we could have someone who knows and loves us preside over the ceremony
• i wrote a 12-page program to serve as a keepsake for our guests, complete with "fun facts" and a "top five" things to do at our wedding, information about the music we chose, blurbs about our wedding party, and a brief but comprehensive history of our relationship
• i walked down the aisle to an instrumental song from The Royal Tenenbaums
• we traveled two hours on a Thursday night to a cheesy nightclub in Deptford, New Jersey to make sure the band we thought we wanted was the right band
• we took six dance lessons to make our first dance both adventurous and entertaining
• i commissioned a groom's cake with kermit and piggy on the top because The Muppets are one of the many quirky things Michael and i both love

in other words, we put a lot of thought into the whole thing. i admit, at times—many times—i wished we'd eloped. or i wished i wasn't so insane. or i wished it was over already. but it was worth all the hours, all the zits that blossomed on my chin from stress, all the trips to Paper Presentation and time spent on marthastewart.com pilfering ideas from other brides.

so many people, during and after the wedding, told me how personal it seemed. a lot of guests commented on all the little touches and attention to detail. and this made my heart swell, almost as much as when people told me they really felt the love.

because, of course, that was what the day was all about. and, honestly, standing up there in front of a room full of people we're absolutely crazy about, being guided through our ceremony by Ellen, my former college professor and friend-for-life, slipping a ring on Michael's left hand and promising him i'd always be his girl—yeah, you could say that i felt the love, too.

as we shared our first kiss as husband and wife, "You're My Best Friend" by Queen started to play and we walked down the aisle to cheers and applause. we left the room and were handed glasses of champagne before being ushered across the way to the bridal suite where we were alone for a few minutes, during which we hugged and kissed and laughed and said "omigod, omigod" over and over and i'm telling you nothing could have wiped the smiles off our faces, nothing in the whole wide world.

we were married! finally! all the blood, sweat and tears of the last nine years had culminated in something so beautiful it really took our breath away.

and the best part was—we still had a party to go to...

mbm